Day 27

In the face of the struggle for freedom,
Give us strength.
In the face of decision about freedom,
Give us wisdom.
In the practice of freedom,
Give us guidance.
From the dangers of freedom,
Give us protection.
In the life of freedom,
Give us joy.
In the way in which we use our freedom,
Give us a clear vision

(South American Council of Churches
"A Litany for Human Rights," All Year Round
British Council of Churches, 1988)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

In what way do you act on your own freedom?
In what ways are you enslaved?
Pastor Patty Fox 40 Days with 40 Christian Mystics

Really difficult questions today. I think we're (I am) enslaved, or at risk of enslavement, to the standards of our society which don't match with the teaching of Jesus. It takes a lot of courage to step away from that and give yourself over to radical love, radical hospitality and radical inclusion. Our lives are so complex but we're enslaved to that complexity. I wish for a life of radical simplicity; loving, serving and sharing. Having the ability to make that choice, to decide what shape my life will take, is the ultimate freedom.

Day 26

Home is a movement,
a quality of relationship,
a state where people seek to be "their own",
and increasingly responsible for the world.

(from The Journey is Home by Nelle Morton; theologian and Christian Educator)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Take a moment to sit quietly.
Consider when you have felt most "at home".
Imagine that place or time or experience.
Recall the sounds, smells, the texture of it.
Breath in a blessing and exhale a blessing
for the home that allows you to be "your own".
Pastor Patty Fox 40 Days with 40 Christian Mystics

For me home is being with those people who make me feel the most comfortable, the most loved; the most like myself. Our relationship with God should feel like home.

Day 25

Life is
A blue sky framed by firs.
Guilt, joy, frustration, contentment;
So many moments
That make up a day.
In all of this
Gratitude spills out
Like sap running freely from the tree.
God is good
We fail
We harm
We forget
but God is always good.
And this God
Lives in me.

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

How would you describe your day? 
Where do you see God in the moments of your day?
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

Today was good. Today was joyful. Today was really busy! I spent time with my husband (we're often on opposite shifts), did some paperwork, spoke with friends, baked brownies, went to a mini-concert at my son's school (huge privilege for a working mum), I had the final session with a girl I'm preparing to receive her first communion and her sister who's getting confirmed, I cooked for my family and we all ate together, I made bath bombs with my daughter, coloured her hair, attended an event at church and had a drink with my church family after that!
I'm home now, a dog on either side and I look back at a busy day absolutely jam-packed with love, laughter and seeing the face if God reflected back at me everywhere I looked. Not all days are like that, but today was a good day.

Day 24

“We draw people to Christ not by loudly discrediting what they believe, by telling them how wrong they are and how right we are, but by showing them a light that is so lovely that they want with all their hearts to know the source of it.”

(From Walking on Water by Madeleine L'Engle)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Read each line of the verse below slowly and in rhythm with your breath.

The true light,
which enlightens everyone,
was coming into the world

John 1:9
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

My heart breaks for those whose religion (especially Christianity) is a serious of "dos" and "do nots". Faith is not a set of divinely ordered rules to restrict us, it's something which sets us free, causes us to shine and reveals God's love in the world through us.

Day 23

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God".  Matthew 5:8

"This may well be the most important of all the beatitudes - from the perspective of wisdom it certainly is.  But what is purity of heart?  This is another of those concepts we have distorted badly in our very morality-oriented Christianity of the West.  For most people, purity of heart would almost certainly mean being virtuous, particularly in the sexual arena.  It would be roughly synonymous with chastity, perhaps even with celibacy.  But in wisdom teaching, purity means singleness, and the proper translation of this beatitude is, really, "Blessed are those whose heart is not divided" or "whose heart is a unified whole"...According to Jesus, this enlightenment takes place primarily within the heart.  when your heart becomes "single" - that is, when it desires one thing only, when it can live in perfect alignment with that resonant field of mutual yearning we called "the righteousness of God," then you "see God"."

(from The Wisdom Jesus: Transforming Heart and Mind by Cynthia Bourgeault)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Heart of mine,
so often scattered into pieces,
be knit together.
Gaze upon the face of the Divine,
and know that there lies essential mercy.
Be a single entity
beating with each pulse
a rhythm of love,
yearning for God.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

Not only did Jesus preach that our hearts should be unified, he declared that our whole lives should be- if we are unified beings there will be a congruence between what we say, do and think. If the law is written in our hearts it will show itself in every aspect of our lives. Blessed are the unified in heart, because they reveal God to others.

Day 22

Every element has a sound,
an original sound from the order of God;
all those sounds unite like the harmony from harps and zithers.
(Hildegard of Bingen)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Accept this offering of sound for your practice of prayer:
"Tosavalsen"

Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

Today Pastor Patty shares something of herself with us- her music. It's intimate- personal. We, like the elements, each have our own sound- our speech, our singing, our playing. We may not have skill, it may sound awful to others, but if we're using it in praise I'm sure it sounds beautiful to God.

Day 21

The person who dives for pearls
is never satisfied to come up with shells.
Neither should those who aim at virtue
be satisfied
with honors and reputation.

The more virtue parades itself,
the more it desires to be seen and acclaimed,
the less likely it is
to be real and true.

True virtue and personal attractiveness
are not rooted and supported
in pride, self-sufficiency, and vanity.
These produce a life lived
strictly for show.
It blooms brilliantly
and quickly withers away.

Having the appearance of virtue
may be fine for those
who do not seek it,
who accept it indifferently,
and who do not mistake the shell for the pearl.
But it can become very dangerous and hurtful
to those who cling to it,
and take delight in it.

For if someone
is truly wise, truly learned,
truly generous and noble,
their gifts will flower
in true humility and modesty.

A really great soul
will not waste itself on such empty goods
as rank, honor, and form.
It has higher aspirations.

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

All Through the Day; seek the pearl, not the shell.

(from Set Your Heart Free; The Practical Spirituality of Francis de Sales)
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

I think we very often miss the pearl because all we see is the shell.

Day 20

Pastor Patty does day 20 & 21 together, so I'll save that for tomorrow. As we're now halfway through our Lenten journey I'll share Thomas Merton's reflection from today's Northumbria community daily prayer:

My Lord God,
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.

Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think that I am following Your will
does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please You
does in fact please You.
And I hope that I have that desire
in all that I am doing.

And I know that if I do this,
You will lead me by the right road
although I may know nothing about it.

Therefore will I trust You always,
though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death,
I will not fear, for You are ever with me,
and will never leave me
to face my perils alone.

(Thomas Merton)

Day 19

“All mysticism is characterised by a passion for unity. To the mystic, true Being and Ultimate Reality are One…Christian mystics aspire to an intimate union of love with God, seeking God’s presence as the very ground of the soul. The human being is endowed with a spiritual sense that opens us inwardly, just as our physical senses open us outwardly.”

(Ursula King, Christian Mystics: Their Lives and Legacies through the Ages, New York: Simon and Schuster, 1988 p.15.)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Contemplate:  Consider what inward "spiritual sense" means to you.  What does it mean to you to experience a "union of love with God"? 

Prayer:  I feel the earth beneath me, the air around me, and the presence of the Holy Spirit within.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

A passion for unity, for connection, to not view difference as something to fear or hate. To be motivated by love, a desire to understand. To celebrate diversity, relate to those who are not our "tribe". Calling someone who is not like us "sister" or "brother". We are one body.

Day 18

Well, I believed that there was a God because I was told it by my grandmother and later by other adults. But when I found that I knew not only that there was God but that I was a child of God, when I understood that, when I comprehended that, more than that, when I internalized that, ingested that, I became courageous. I dared to do anything that was a good thing. I dared to do things as distant from what seemed to be in my future. I became a translator in Serbo-Croat in Yugoslavia, and I conducted the Boston Pops. I taught at the Habima Theatre in Tel Aviv in Israel, and I worked as a journalist in Egypt with the only English news magazine in the Middle East. All of that, and I come from a little village in Arkansas, smaller than Picayune, (laughs) and I was a young black woman, trying to do all the good things. When I was asked to do something good, I often say yes, I'll try, yes, I'll do my best. And part of that is believing, if God loves me, if God made everything from leaves to seals and oak trees, then what is it I can't do?

~ Maya Angelou  (our oldest daughter's namesake)

(taken from interview conducted via teleconference, NOLA.com | The Times-Picayune and The (Baton Rouge) Advocate. http://www.nola.com/living/baton-rouge/index.ssf/2013/02/maya_angelou_discusses_her_fai.html )

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

God, help me to internalize, help me comprehend
that I am your child.

May I be encouraged by this reality.
May I courageously do good in this world
because I believe
because I know
that You love me.

Amen.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

It can be really hard sometimes to accept that God loves us- because of the things we've done, the things we've experienced, the things we've been told or the type of religious baggage we've inherited or grown up with. What have we not done because we thought we weren't "worthy"? What could we achieve if, like Maya Angelou, we come to understand how much God loves us?

Day 17

"...in Christian understanding truth is neither an object "out there" nor a proposition about such objects.  Instead, truth is personal, and all truth is known in personal relationships. Jesus is a paradigm, a model of this personal truth.  In him, truth, once understood as abstract, principled, propositional, suddenly takes on a human face and a human frame. In Jesus, the disembodied "word" takes flesh and walks among us.  Jesus calls us to truth, not in the form of creeds or theologies or world-views.  His call to truth is a call to community - with him, with each other, with creation and its Creator. If what we know is an abstract, impersonal, apart from us, it cannot be truth, for truth involves a vulnerable, faithful, and risk-filled interpenetration of the knower and the known".

(from To Know As We Are Known; A Spirituality of Education by Parker J. Palmer)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

One of my closest friends in college and I used to sit for hours and contemplate together the meaning of truth with a capital "T".  As young evangelicals we felt a sense of urgency to understand and speak of ultimate truth with conviction and authority.  This book by Parker Palmer helped me move away from the need to be right toward the much more difficult necessity of living harmoniously with all of creation - even those parts I don't like so much, like those who think they have all the answers.

What does truth mean to you?
When have you felt connected to something true?
In what way does Christ embody truth in your life?
Spend five minutes matching your breath with these words:

"Spirit of truth, wash over me"
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

Truth for me is about that connectedness, as opposed to disengagement. If you feel connected to someone or something you see the truth in it, it or they are no longer "other". For me that connectedness is the Holy Spirit, helping us see God in all things and all people.

Day 16

This I know
That the only way to live
             Is like the rose
which lives
             without a why.

(From Meditations with Meister Eckhart by Matthew Fox)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

I don't know if it is actually possible to live without a why but if I try to do so it does require that I stay completely in the present moment. No whys about the past or whys about the future.  Maybe a momentary why about the present but then the only reasonable answer is "to be" which as a follower of Christ translate "to love".

Imagine yourself as a rose in full bloom.
Take in the sun and rain
Endure the wind and cold
Be for a moment
Letting the sweet scent of love and compassion
The essence of life
Rise.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

As I've been working nights it's rather difficult to imagine being a rose in bloom, so I've decided instead to be a fern, flourishing in the shade. A fern can live without a why too. There will be no whys today.

Day 15

"...I think it is important to pray naked in front of a full-length mirror sometimes, especially when you are full of loathing for your body.  Maybe you think you are too heavy.  Maybe you have never liked the way your hipbones stick out.  do your breasts sag?  Are you too hairy?  It is always something.  Then again, maybe you have been sick or come through some surgery that has changed the way you look.  You have gotten glimpses of your body as you have bathed or changed clothes, but so far maintaining your equilibrium has depended upon staying covered up as much as you can....This can only go on so long, especially for someone who officially believes that God loves flesh and blood, no matter what kind of shape it is in.

Whether you are sick or well, lovely or irregular, there comes a time when it is vitally important for your spiritual health to drop your clothes, look in the mirror, and say,

"Here I am. 
This is the body-like-no-other that my life has shaped. 
I live here. 
This is my soul's address". 

After you take a good look around, you may decide that there is a lot to be thankful for, all things considered.

from An Altar in the World by Barbara Brown Taylor 

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

I think Barbara Brown Taylor has already given us a suggestion. Question is, which of us will actually do it?
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

I might not love my body but it's strong and healthy. Apart from a bit of structural damage (back and feet) I'm doing OK.  My body works, even though I don't give it enough respect. I've started exercising again this week after a few years in the wilderness- I want to give my body the respect it deserves. I might not love how my body looks but I love what it can do.

Day 14

When we speak about celebration we tend rather easily to bring to mind happy, pleasant, gay festivities in which we can forget for a while the hardships of life and immerse ourselves in an atmosphere of music, dance, drinks, laughter, and a lot of cozy small-talk.  But celebration in the Christian sense has very little to do with this.  Celebration is possible only through the deep realization that life and death are never found completely separate.

Celebration can really come about only where fear and love, joy and sorrow, tears and smiles can exist together. Celebration is the acceptance of life in a constantly increasing awareness of its preciousness. And life is precious not only because it can be seen, touched, and tasted, but also because it will be gone one day.

When we celebrate a wedding we celebrate a union as well as a departure; when we celebrate death we celebrate lost friendship as well as gained liberty.  There can be tears after weddings and smiles after funerals.  We can indeed make our sorrows, just as much as our joys, a part of our celebration of life in the deep realization that life and death are not opponents but do, in fact, kiss each other at every moment of our existence.

When we have been able to celebrate life in all these decisive moments where gaining and losing - that is, life and death - touched each other all the time, we will be able to celebrate even our own dying because we have learned from life that those who lose it can find it (Matt. 16:25)

from Creative Ministry by Henri Nouwen

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Consider how life and death have kissed each other in your life.
Is it possible for you to celebrate this experience of gaining and losing?
Hold each of these considerations in mind and offer them to God using this abbreviated prayer written by Henri Nouwen:

Dear Lord, today I thought of the words of Vincent van Gogh: "It is true there is an ebb and flow, but the sea remains the sea". 

You are the sea.

There are days of sadness and days of joy;
there are feelings of guilt and feelings of gratitude;
there are moments of failure and moments of success;
but all of them are embraced by your unwavering love.

O Lord, sea of love and goodness, let me not fear too much the storms and winds of my daily life, and let me know that there is ebb and flow but that the sea remains the sea.  Amen.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

The next few days might have me posting at odd times due to night shifts.

I think one of the most harmful ways we've evolved as a society is by ignoring that we will one day die. Part of Lent is acknowledging our death but also figuring out how we live in the "now", fully embracing this gift we have. Life and death are completely intertwined, I see this clearly in ministry and nursing.

Day 13

Jesus hath now many lovers of His heavenly kingdom,
but few bearers of His cross.

He hath many desirous of consolation,
but few of tribulation.
He findeth many companions of his table,
but few of His abstinence.

All desire to rejoice with Him,
few are willing to endure for Him.

Many love Jesus so long as no adversities befall them.

O how powerful is the pure love of Jesus which is mixed with no self-interest nor self-love!

Are not all those to be called mercenary who are ever seeking consolations? Do they not show themselves to be rather lovers of themselves than of Christ, who are always thinking of their own profit and advantage?

Where shall one be found who is willing to serve God for nought?

(from The Imitation of Christ
by Thomas 'A Kempis aka Gerhard Groote)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

I have a confession to make.  I am almost always thinking about my own profit and advantage.  I meet someone new and think "can this person make me happy? be my friend? provide me with xyz?"  It bugs the heck out of me, but it's almost an immediate response.  I find it a challenge to love with no self-interest or selfish self-love [notice I am not advocating self-deprecation just warning against self-preoccupation]. 

Tribulation, abstinence, endurance; rather than run from these by filling my world with things, people and experiences I will seek Christ in the void left by their absence.  I will seek Christ by considering first what others might need in order to know that they are loved.

Today I will greet each person (including my family members) by first taking a breath and saying to myself "What does this person need in this particular moment?"
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

What a powerful reflection from Thomas 'A Kempis. Our own interests do come before almost everything and it's hard to lay that aside. I try to start my day with a similar prayer to the question Pastor Patty asks at the end of her meditation (asking God that I see the need in others and meet that if I can), but it doesn't take long for self interest to take over. As with all spiritual exercises it takes practise, and the more we practise the more likely it is to become habit.

Day 12

God created through love and for love. 
God did not create anthing except love itself,
and the means to love.
He created love in all its forms. 
He created beings capable of love
from all possible distances. 
Because no other could do it,
he himself went to the greatest possible distance,
the infinite distance. 
This infinite distance between God and God,
this supreme tearing apart,
this agony beyond all others,
this marvel of love, is the crucifixion. 
Nothing can be further from God
than that which has been made accursed.

This tearing apart,
over which supreme love
places the bond of supreme union,
echoes perpetually across the universe
in the midst of the silence,
like two notes,
separate yet melting into one,
like pure and heart-rending harmony.

This is the Word of God.
The whole creation is nothing but its vibration.
When human music in its greatest purity
pierces our soul,
this is what we hear through it.

(from Waiting For God by Simone Weil)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Put on a piece of music that pierces your soul and listen for the Word of God.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

This pierces my soul and let's me know I'm surrounded by God's love:

Karl Jenkins- Benedictus

Day 11

In my Father's house are many rooms;
if it were not so,
would I have told you
that I go to prepare a place for you?

(John 14:2)

It seems quite a coincidence that this verse has come up today from Pastor Patty, from the Mystical gospel of John, as it's from a passage so widely used at funerals.
Today we gathered together, a community set apart and bound by grief, to say goodbye to our lovely Revd. Huw's remarkable wife, Nat. I'd only known her since August but found her to be warm, funny, open and just a delight to be around.
We didn't have John 14 today but Philippians 4:
Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

By way of a meditation I leave you with the poem which was read at the service:

"God" by Andrew Rudd
God
doesn't have to knock
uses the front door key
doesn't check how clean the house is

knows how to use the kettle
and where the spoons go
washes up

is quite content to sit
and chatter about issues
of no importance

ar just be quiet

Day 10

Today's short reflection comes from Patty Fox herself, I don't feel I need to add to this today:

"Fresh sap has a certain enigmatic character to it, sterile yet vibrant with a hint of mysticism. Its crystal clarity gives it this sense of eternalness... and it can be deceiving how ephemeral in fact it really is. At room temperature, it lasts only around 48 hours. It can be frozen but in the past when this was not an option, the way of letting it live beyond its season was, like with many raw materials, through transformation."

(From Nordicfoodlab.org)

Rather than quote an established mystic today I have chosen to post this commentary, along with my own  thoughts, on sap. Lisanne and I spent two hours Saturday afternoon helping a team of people collect sap from tapped maple trees. It's been so cold that the sap has not been flowing but yesterday temperatures reached over 40 so it was a perfect day for collecting.

I like how the author of this quote from nordicfood.org says "the way of letting [the sap] live beyond its season" is "through transformation".  It reminds me that in order to survive - thrive - live, more often than not, change of one sort or another is necessary.  And change requires effort. Trudging through snow carrying Home Depot-like buckets of sap is exhausting. And beyond the collecting it must go through a lengthy process of being cooked down before becoming maple syrup. Like most transformations, that of turning sap into something sweet requires tremendous work.

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

Consider any life changes you may be facing be they relational, spiritual, vocational or something else. Cup your hands together and imagine that you hold that experience in your hands. How heavy does it weigh? What color and shape would you give it if you could?  Are the contours of it smooth or sharp?  Do you feel like you hold it alone or are their other hands beneath yours helping you manage it?

Bring your hands to your heart, and taking a deep cleansing breath, whisper these words "may I walk carefully as I carry this treasure.  May I endure all that it requires of me, and may the resulting transformation be shaped and blessed by God.  Amen "
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

Day 9

Faithful friends are a well-built shelter;
when you find one, you find a treasure.
Faithful friends are priceless;
their value is beyond counting.
Faithful friends are the essence of life,
a blessing for those who fear Yahweh.
Those who fear Yahweh treat others with respect;
and their friends will behave the same way.

Sirach 6:14
(Sirach was written by a Jewish scribe who lived in Jerusalem in the early third century BC. His name was Jesus, son of Eleazar, son of Sirach. He is often called simply "Ben Sira.")

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

"A primary activity in spiritual direction is simply listening, being a sounding board on whom others can try out ideas, oprinions, or self-criticism...This is almost a natural response to deep friendship. By making such friendship spiritual by a specific agreement of both parties, you will truly find "a treasure beyond price and a life-saving remedy". (Father William A. Meninger from The Committed Life).

Read the passage from Sirach slowly, pausing a few seconds at the end of each line.
Take a moment today and consider who among those you know might be your faithful friend.
Email or call that friend and ask if they might act as a spiritual director if even for just this one time.
Consider an idea, opinion or self-criticism that you might express to your friend and ask for their feedback.
Acknowledge their feedback refraining from the urge to agree or disagree.
Offer your response to this feedback in prayer perhaps using the statement "Creator God, pour forth your Wisdom on me and grant me insight and understanding, amen."
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

I couldn't get through any aspect of my life without my friends; they are the most precious gift from God. My closest friend, Lindsay has been on my life for 34 years and knows me better than anyone- there's no way I could be anything but myself with her. I trust her honesty and counsel and she makes me laugh my bum off!
This weekend I have the utter privilege of spending in the company of two much newer friends, Tracy and Alison, who I met through training for ministry. The three and a half years we've spent together have been some of the toughest we've each experienced, but our friendship has kept us strong through it all. We're completely honest with each other, yet hold one another with such love and respect (well...mostly, we do tend to tease  Alison). Most importantly we laugh together. There's no facade, no barriers. Like when we're before God there can be no pretence or inauthenticity.

Day 8

The life of contemplation is, then,
not simply a life of human technique and discipline;
it is the life of the Holy Spirit in our inmost souls.

Contemplation is the work of love,
and the contemplative proves his [sic] love
by leaving all things,
even the most spiritual things, for God
in nothingness, detachment, and "night". 
But the deciding factor in contemplation is the free and unpredictable action of God.

(From The Inner Experience by Thomas Merton)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

When you sit in prayer or meditation begin by imagining the Holy Spirit flowing through you.  You control nothing of the Spirit's movements.  You do not cause the Spirit to be present.  You are simply providing a conduit. If it helps, picture the Spirit radiating outward from your heart and through the palms of your hands; outward to a world in need of love and grace.
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

It can be so easy to forget our interconnectedness, to not realise we are all filled with the same sustaining spirit and overlook our worth as different, (equally valued) parts of the body of Christ; each vital, each important.
What's even worse is when we don't recognise that in other.
Even though we are different we are all one body.
Even when we profoundly disagree we are all one body.
Even if we feel we hate each other we are all one body.
Fostering our sense of connectedness may be a way to move away from the isolating individualism which permeates our culture and move towards a more relational, community-focused life.

Day 7

Lent Day 7

"By the term "Spiritual Exercises" is meant every method of examination of conscience, of meditation, of contemplation, of vocal and mental prayer, and of other spiritual activities....For just as taking a walk, journeying on foot, and running are bodily exercises, so we call Spiritual Exercises every way of preparing and disposing the soul to rid itself of all inordinate attachments, and, after their removal, of seeking and finding the will of God..."

(From The Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius edited by Louis J. Puhl, S.J.)

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

What are you most attached to?
A person?
An emotion?
A goal?

What do you do to rid yourself of inordinate or excessive attachment to these?
When you are able to do this, if even for a few seconds, how do you then go about seeking and finding God?
Pastor Patty Fox 40 Christian mystics in 40 days

I was asked a couple of weeks ago if I'm motivated by success or failure- whether my drive comes from wanting to achieve success or from a fear of failure. For me it's definitely the latter and that’s pretty unhealthy. It's an attachment I certainly need to work upon ridding myself of because it's when we allow ourselves to fail that we find something of God. On the face of it Jesus was a complete failure, yet he tells us everything we need to know of God.

Day 6

Consider the words of Jesus:
"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your body, what you shall put on" (Matt. 6:25)

When you sit down to meditate, the first thing is to let go of your anxieties.  And when I say anxieties, I include reasoning and thinking and preoccupation and planning and all the rest.  Just let them go.  Nor is this easy.  For, as we all know, the human mind is restless.  It looks to the future with fear or anticipation; it looks to the past with nostalgia or with guilt.  Seldom does it remain in the here and now.  Yet Jesus tells us clearly to drop anxiety about the future in order to remain in the present.

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself.  Let the day's own trouble be sufficient for the day" (Matt. 6:34).

This sounds simple; but how difficult it is!  For we love our anxieties; we cling to them and wallow in them.  We need the advice of Jesus:  "Do not be anxious..."  His words will gradually teach us the gentle art of letting go.

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation:

If you wish you can simply repeat to yourself the words of the Lord:  "Do not be anxious", "do not be anxious"...Or, again, some people like to use the words of Peter at the Transfiguration, "Lord, it is good for us to be here" (Matt. 17:4).  Any words of sacred scripture, repeated again and again with relish, can be an excellent form of meditation; and they will succeed in warding off all anxiety and needless thinking and reasoning.  Moreover, this simple process brings us into the present moment.

All of the above is taken from Christian Zen by William Johnston.

Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics.

Anxiety and fear for the future is something I really struggle with. I daily need to remind myself of Jesus' words and do my best to live a more mindful life, being fully 'here' in the present.

Day 5

Be praised Good Lord for Brother Sun
who brings us each new day.

Be praised for Sister Moon: white
beauty bright and fair, with wandering
stars she moves through the night.

Be praised my Lord for Brother Wind,
for air and clouds and the skies of every season.

Be praised for Sister Water: humble,
helpful, precious, pure; she cleanses
us in rivers and renews us in rain.

Be praised my Lord for Brother fire:
he purifies and enlightens us.

Be praised my Lord for Mother Earth:
abundant source, all life sustaining;
she feeds us bread and fruit and gives us flowers.

- St. Francis of Assisi

A suggestion for meditation and prayer:

Go outside right now and search for a glimpse of God's good creation. 
I think you'll know it when you see it!
Pastor Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

I'm most comfortable with Christianity that embraces all aspects of nature and creation, I'm with Bob Seeger in that I see a forest as a cathedral. It's difficult to be in tune with the natural world when you're working 12 hour shifts on an isolation Ward but there are two parts of my which I try to savour. Firstly the walk into walk. There's some very mature trees on route which means for those 10 minutes in the morning walking in from my car is hear birdsong- it's so loud you wouldn't believe it in such a built up area. Secondly the walk back to my car. The cool night air hits me as soon as I walk outside- I especially love it if it's raining a bit! It's so refreshing after being indoors for so long. I often wonder how my patients must feel, some of whom will have been inside for weeks, taking those first steps outside.

Day 4

The Spirit both nurtures contemplation and empowers action; the Spirit guides us into a life in which these moments of stillness and action, silence and energy are balanced.

In the Christian tradition, the language of the Holy Spirit is not only one of breath, attention, and presence, but also a language of energy and fire.  The experience of the Spirit is not only the experience of calm insight, but also the experience of power and empowerment.

(Diana L. Eck from Encountering God; A Spiritual Journey from Bozeman to Banaras)

A suggestion for prayer and meditation:

What Spirit-filled action can you take today?  Just choose one small thing that you know you can follow through on.  It doesn't have to be loud or radical or something that you commit to for the rest of your life.  It just needs to be an expression of the Spirit of Love that God causes to flow through you like an energetic electric current. 

Patty Fox 40 days with 40 Christian mystics

I've been pondering this since the early hours of this morning and the two words which have suddenly struck me are "power" and "empowerment", which causes me to wonder where the power lies within my denomination and who is in need of empowerment.
My spirit-filled action is to continue to question and challenge inequalities and power imbalance within the church I know is flawed but still love.

Wilderness

Sermon preached this morning, following the awful news earlier in the week that our minister's wife had died quite suddenly. It was incredibly difficult to know what I could say, what I could offer to a community in grief.

Based on Genesis 2:15-17; 3:1-7 & Matthew 4:1-11

In any normal week I struggle to think what I’m going to put into my sermon, it’s never an easy process but the events of this week have meant that each day I’ve sat and wondered how on earth I was going to stand before you this morning and what I would say.
This week has been overwhelming- sad, shocking and heart-breaking. Some of you may only just have heard the news of Natalie’s death and I think that for each of us it’s still incredibly raw and difficult to comprehend.

You might be wondering how we can make sense of it, but the years I’ve spent working in cancer care have very much taught me that there isn’t any rationalisation we can give, despite our faith and our belief that God is present in all things there simply isn’t any sense or reason to be found right now. We have no easy answers as to why things like this happen.

It’s in our human nature to want to make sense of things, to understand why do bad things happen to good people? Why is there suffering? Why is the world the way it is? Today we’ve heard part of the creation story which goes some way to try and explain why there’s sin and suffering in the world.

Whether you believe in the creation story literally or whether you interpret it as allegory I would guess that when you’re experiencing grief or hurt it gives you little comfort in the midst of what you’re experiencing. This isn’t a time to be rational. We’re asking ourselves: where is God in this?

I believe everything I need to know about God can be found in the life and teaching of Jesus, so that’s who I go to to try and find a way of moving through this, and I find a man who also experienced loss, pain and grief. In Jesus we see that God knows our grief, has experienced it and is right here with us in our loss right now.

We began our journey into Lent this week, a time many of us may think of as being a solemn time, a time for acknowledging pain and brokenness, both in the world and in our lives. Arch-bishop Justin’s Ash Wednesday reflection encouraged us to think of Lent as a time of joy as we renew ourselves and put aside the things which may be causing separation between ourselves and God.

This might be hard for us to get or head around if we’re starting from a place of such sadness, but I think there’s something we can take from thinking about the days ahead as a time for renewal.

I read somewhere else this week that Lent is a season dedicated to falling apart, and maybe we have to fall apart somewhat before we can be put back together and renewed in the light of God’s love.

In our culture of denial Lent is set aside as a time to acknowledge the things we’d prefer not to confront. We deconstruct our life, faith and belief so that we may be reconstructed more whole again; deconstructed into wholeness.

We’ve begun to follow Jesus into the wilderness, we’re present with him in his temptation as he is present in ours. Our biggest temptation may be to avoid acknowledging pain and not to let ourselves fall apart a little but to push it away and hide from it; in doing so we hide part of ourselves from God. We put up the obstacles we should be trying to tear down during Lent.

The good news is that Jesus comes to find those who’ve hidden themselves from God;

For the Son of Man came to seek out and to save the lost

In Lent we’re invited to let God find us where we are, wherever our hiding place is. I think God might find us right now in a place which is a little bit lost, and that’s ok- let God find us acknowledging our sorrow, our lack of answers and our lack of understanding. When we ask “why did this happen” it’s ok to say “I don’t know”.

We also should remember that whilst Lent is often thought of in terms of our individual and personal journeys we’re each also walking together as a community. We’re a community united in grief, drawing together in love, support and prayer for Huw and Billy and their wider family. And we’re united in our shared love of God, a love that must always radiate outwards, beyond these walls and beyond this community.

Our purpose in deepening our relationship with the divine through Lent is to be able to live more fully in the world, to be a blessing in the places we find ourselves and accept with both hands the amazing gift which is our life.

We may be in the wilderness right now but our journey back is one towards the cross, and towards the ultimate hope of Easter day.

To finish I’d just like to share something from Pope Francis, which hopefully reflects something of our community here:

Do you want to fast this Lent?

Fast from hurting words and say kind words

Fast from sadness and be filled with gratitude

Fast from anger and be filled with patience

Fast from pessimism and be filled with hope

Fast from worries and have trust in God

Fast from complaints and contemplate simplicity

Fast from pressures and be prayerful

Fast from bitterness and fill your hearts with joy

Fast from selfishness and be compassionate to others

Fast from grudges and be reconciled

Fast from words and be silent so you can listen.

Amen

Day 3

Prayer is not primarily saying words or thinking thoughts.
It is, rather, a stance.
It's a way of living in the Presence, living in awareness of the Presence, and even of enjoying the Presence.
The full contemplative is not just aware of the Presence, but trusts, allows, and delights in it.

A suggestion for your prayer and meditation; practicing living in the Presence of God:

Be still and know that I am God.
Be still and know that I am.
Be still and know.
Be still.
Be.

from Everything Belongs by Franciscan priest Father Richard Rohr
Rev Patty Fox 40 days with 40 mystics

I have to admit I'm a bit of a Richard Rohr fan girl.
The thought of prayer as simply our "being" or "being with God" might be very alien depending on your own experiences and Tradition, but for me it's everything. God knows what's in my heart and mind, who and what I wish to bring before him.

Day 2

Faith is
nothing else but
a right understanding
of our being -
trusting
and allowing things to be;

A right understanding
that we are in God
and God
whom we do not see
is in us.

Julian of Norwich
(from Meditations with Julian of Norwich by Brendan Doyle)

Suggested prayer practice:

Breathing in I know I am in God.
Breathing out I know God is in me.

Breathing in.....I am in God.
Breathing out.....God is in me.

(Sit quietly for 10 minutes following your breath and internally repeating these words on the inhalation and exhalation)
Patty Fox: 40 days with 40 mystics

I think it's very hard for us to contemplate that we are in God and God is in us. It's in our nature to think much less of ourselves than that. This practice and Mother Julian's words remind us we are made for and part of something more vast and more beautiful than we imagine.

A Mystical Lenten Journey

It's Ash Wednesday so that means the beginning of 40 days of blogging. After several years of task-based Lent activities I decided it was time for a change. It's been a bit of a crazy year with being ordained and taking on a new role in preparation for priesthood in June, so I felt that something to supercharge my spiritual life was in order.
Initially I was going to follow the Society of St John the Evangelists (SSJE) 5 Marks of Love, but some events over the past 24 hours means I've changed track to something much more simple.
I've recently been revisiting my interest in celtic spirituality and Christian mysticism. A quick Google led me to Revd. Patty Fox's Lent journey from 2014: 40 Christian mystics in 40 days.
I'll also be folliwing the Northumbria Communities pattern of daily prayer. I'm intrigued and excited about what lies ahead.